One week in…

I have been running again for a week now. I am so glad to be hitting the pavement again but it is painful. Not physically but mentally. I am too much of a competitive person (yes I compete with myself and am my own worst competitor) to really feel good about my performance. My ideal world would be one where I do not have to work back up to a piddly 3 mile run at a good pace. I’m not there yet and although I know I should not be so hard on myself since Mercie is only 6 weeks old I can’t help but get bummed out a bit.

One would think that with this being baby #4 I would actually remember that being a milk factory takes a lot of energy and can take a toll on your body…it seems obvious to most everyone else but when your brain cells get sucked out at each feeding it is amazing I can remember to feed my other 3 kids. Anyway, yesterday was a hard and exhausting run and I had to be hit over the head by Tracy reminding that I am making milk and running and that I would more likely suffer from running since my body will not slack off on the milk part. All of it made since then and explained why I crash hard in the afternoon for a couple of hours.

But it still does not help me feel OK with slowing down or walking a bit…the mental war I have with myself is tough and yes ridiculous as well but that mentality keeps me going and also is there to play the Rocky Theme song for me at the end of every run!


3 Responses to “One week in…”

  1. 1 Em
    July 15, 2008 at 6:23 AM

    I love you and you are my inspiration! You are feeding a precious little angel. Please, I know you won’t, but please give yourself credit for that! You are out there, which is more than I can say for me. I am not even going to attempt to do it with my stupid *&(*ing sling on! No way.
    I had a great day yesterday. I almost have full range of motion, still passive, which may kill me in the end. I hate just having my right arm just “be along for the ride” but that is all part of it! As soon as the sling is out, I am on the streets… just watch me go! It is all about being competitive! I completely agree. It isn’t going to kill you to listen to your body a little while longer!!!!!!! See you soon!!!!!! 🙂

  2. 2 Anonymous
    July 15, 2008 at 6:34 AM

    thanks! I am so looking forward to seeing you again! Take care of that arm, glad things are getting better!

  3. 3 Anonymous
    July 25, 2008 at 9:59 PM

    You go, girl!! I’m impressed! Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’ll get there again!

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