12
Jan
10

Never Settled…

This is one time of the year that I am less busy with things to do but I never feel settled. Maybe it is just the human condition to feel guilty about not doing anything, not having a To Do List. Or maybe I just want to do so much.

Yes, there is always the things I have to do, be a mom, chef, maid, cab driver, nurse, etc…etc… but I have many projects that need to be completed and things I just want to do that will help me be a better me, HOWEVER, I just want to feel like my list has been completed and have a lil fun and not feel guilty. Don’t get me wrong I have fun but do you remember the feeling you had years ago when you were not married, had no kids, may have had a job but it may have been for just blow money and you had little to no bills? Ya know, that brief stage in life where you had lil to no responsibility except to yourself and your biggest decisions were what to wear and where you went on the weekends?

I miss those days. I want a few back. I want to be able to take a day and not feel guilty about not doing what NEEDS to be done and I don’t want it to double my work for the next day if I truly take off! Every once in a while when J and I can vacay sans kids I feel like that. I feel so free, relaxed and so refreshed when we return home that I want to do the To Do List, like I missed it. It has been over 2 years since we did something like that. I must be having withdrawals and horribly strong cravings for that again.

Only if time could just stand still so I can complete a few things and then I could just carry on….

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