Hard heart lessons

It never feels good to get a call from another mom who needs to talk to ya about your kids.

I know I have good kids. I know all people have bad moments. But that is not solace for a moms heart when you must have those stern talks with your kids about their ugly behavior. I am heart-broken and I know because they saw my heart-break they are heart-broken. I just hope they are heart-broken for their actions and not because I was heart-broken.

When asked they did tell me what they said and how they acted that was unacceptable. I told them the many reasons why they are not to act that way. Explained how others will view them based on their actions. We have always talked about how their actions and words can either make them beautiful girls or ugly girls. And then I claimed them… (of course I always have but never put it in these words) I told them they are my girls, and my girls are not being raised to be ugly, to be disrespectful, to be mean and manipulate. But my girls are to aways love, share, be kind, be honest regardless of how others treat them or what they say. Their behavior is theirs and not to be the result of someone else’s actions or words.

Then we moved on to what will be the hard part for them. The apology, apologizing for their specific actions one by one to the one they hurt, acknowledging they hurt that person and asking for forgiveness. They were instructed on how to do this apology and we will be doing that very soon.

The part of the conversation we had next was about why I limit certain shows they like to watch and that now they will be prohibited. These shows seem innocent to the masses and I could watch theses shows and think they are harmless. But when an impressionable child watches them, loves them they tend to emulate the actions, attitudes and behaviors of the characters. This is the problem. At my age with my world experience I can see the shows, understand the humor and reason for the sarcasm and disrespect without it changing who I am. My girls, however, are not there yet. So there was a lesson as to why they will not be allowed to watch certain programs but will only watch and listen to things that will fill their hearts and minds with pure, caring, loving ways.

In my ideal world this will be that last talk I have to have with them about this but I know better. I just hope that they are convicted to change their ways, be a better person and show loving kindness to everyone and so then these conversations are few and far between.

I am not saint by any means and I still fall and make the same mistakes but my kids are and always have been strong convictions to make sure I am the best person I can be all the time.

Here’s to raising great kids and looking forward to see the young ladies, and grown women they turn out to be!


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August 2010
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