03
Sep
11

relationships…

they can suck can’t they? I have many that are great and wonderful…could not imagine my life without them. I have also had many that are painful, toxic and full of heartache. I am nowhere close to being so wise in how to handle any relationship perfectly. Emotions can consume us and we can easily lose our temper and forget we need to filter things.

I am dealing with a heartache currently. It’s not the someone does not like me kind, that seems like a piece of cake emotional issue right now. Instead it is one that I needed to step away from due to unhealthy talk and attitudes and info I learned that made me and my husband uncomfortable. Due to that information the best choice for us was to limit interactions. It was the healthiest choice we could have made for all. Unfortunately, things were no aligned to talk to “the others” about it in a healthy, helpful, loving manner. We knew things would come to a head about the issues since it would be noticed that we were taking a few steps back from interaction with them.

This was not a flippant, emotional, quick response. We spent several hours talking it out, seeking counsel from ones we consider wise and we had to take into account how it was affecting our relationship with one another. Yet, “the others” have no idea the hours and emotions we went through coming to this conclusion. I have no idea what they think is the issue. I cannot control that  and I do not feel it is the right timing to bring all of the information to light. More than us and “the others” are involved. For things to be explained constructively and properly we all, and possibly, a mediator need to sit down together. I honestly, do not see that happening. I would like it to so the air can be cleared and the situation resolved. But right now I am on a rollercoaster ride of emotions.

One of “the others” has lashed out to me (and maybe to more people) and has said I have not been nice to her. The truth is when I have come in contact with her I have been polite and respectful. I have just limited that due to my pain and not knowing how to handle the situation. I did not want things to blow up and I did not want to do or say somethings I would regret later. I know “the others” do not know what is really going on and are probably hurt as well. I just don’t think right now if I fully explained the why of the entire situation it would help, make things better and I am not sure the 3rd party wants to go down that road.

I just feel attacked and judged wrongly and that is why it is painful to me. I am big enough to say I do not think I am without error in this situation. I know I am not perfect. I have just tried to be true to myself, my faith, my family and do what is best. It may not have always had the best delivery and I am willing to own up to that. I just wish I was not so emotionally affected to the heartache that is happening.

 

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1 Response to “relationships…”


  1. 1 Angela
    September 3, 2011 at 12:25 PM

    The love word can mean happiness and also make you feel like you can’t live anymore without that one you been loving and caring and planning to spend your life with..kinda like me after 2 beautiful children and putting 10 & 1/2 yrs into this relationship he decides he’s going to cheat and everytime id ask or comment that he’s going to see his new gf I got the ” your crazy and psycho and need help..you need to get on meds, why would I wanna be in another relationship I got enough going on w u.” And his famous line ” why can’t you just be NORMAL?” Don’t you just love the emotional abuse n we r not even doing a thing wrong he is…but its put on me..and when I finally seen a text frm her saying why u treatn me like this lately then another one sayn I want my ***** key bk, that was it..my dream n my daughters dream of us being a family was shattered forever..and all he could say or do I should say was laugh and left..that was the end of almost 11 yrs. There will hopefully be a day they ” breakup” n he is alone n realizes he lost his family and the one girl that loved him w all my heart n wanted to be w him til my ladt breath…n she’s gone now for good. Karma is a bitch!! Good luck to you! I’m feeling your pain n confusion.
    Angela
    Nashua Nh


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