If worrying isn’t trusting or shows a lack of faith I’m a hot mess. As a parent how do you not worry? How do you fully release it over to God ? Can I do both and it still be considered faithful and trusting?
Or is it the absolutely need we have at times that every second of every day for days upon days upon days all we can say is I trust you Jesus? Is that what faith really looks like? A constant, repetitive sentence prayer when you have no other words to say and nothing to offer when praying seems hard?
It feels one-sided, the constant asking and not much to offer…the constant asking and the worrying doesn’t feel to be improving…times like these I easily judge how much I took for granted and expected when things ran smoother and the worry was lighter, if any at all.
I know He hears me and will work things for the good but as a recovering perfectionist the heartache and my own inadequacy of my relationship that feels more self-serving, needy and far from saint worthy crowds my mind and leaves me feeling empty-handed, no offering to give and I am just begging for peace.
Our faith is forged in the fire right? Why is it so hard to fully release the amazing blessing God gave you back to Him fully and completely unloading your cross for Him to carry because His plan is perfect? He even asks for us to hand over our burdens but when the burden lands in our lap why the struggle….?